Super Cafe: The Next Knight Rises

Transcript
We open with a parody of Robert Pattinson's Batman reveal teaser as we see Bruce wearing the costume in a red room. He sings to the tune of Michael Giacchino's theme for the upcoming film... and then Superman opens the door, revealing that Bruce is in the bathroom of The Super Cafe.

Batman: HEY! Someone's in here!

Superman: Whoops! Sorry!

Batman: Occupado!

Superman: I didn't know someone was in here.

Batman: Don't you knock?!

Superman: Bruce? Is that you?

Batman: Yes, it's me! How do you not know that?!

Superman: Cafe lines the doors with lead, dude. Why is it red in there?

Batman: It's my mood lighting!

Superman: Mood lighting, for using the bathroom?

Batman: No, not for the bathroom! For my new suit!

Superman: New suit?! I wanna see!

Batman: No! Get out of here!

Superman: C'mon, why not?

Batman: I'm doing this selfie teaser thing. Just go away.

Superman: What's with the ears, though? They look drastically different.

Batman: I know they are! I may change them. I was afraid to show them at this point.

Superman: People are gonna judge, dude.

Batman: I understand that! Now please, give me a little privacy!

Superman: What is that thing on your chest? Is that made from the gun that killed your parents?

Batman: Why would you just assume something so specific like that?!

Superman: I don't know, it looked gun-like.

Batman: IT LOOKS LIKE THE BAT SYMBOL! How would I even retrieve that weapon, much less know it's the actual one?!

Superman: Are you trying to get me to say because you're Batman?

Batman: No, I genuinely think turning the gun that killed my parents into a bat symbol is weird so I want to know why you're asking me if that's what it is!

Superman: I'm sorry, man. I just have a lot of questions.

Batman: You'll get all of your answers! Just let me have this!

Superman: Alright, man.

Superman closes the door and leaves as we pan over to Bruce.

Superman: [shouting in the cafe] Hey guys, Batman has a new suit! Again!

Everyone: Cool!/I wanna see!/Bring it out!/Release The Snyder Cut!

Batman: Oh no.

Bruce gets out the Batphone and calls Alfred.

Batman: Alfred, I'm gonna need that new Batcycle ahead of schedule.

"Alfred": Yes, he wants it! He needs it! Alfred will bring Batman The Precious.

Batman: Sweet.

We now cut to... Gollum driving the Batcycle.

Gollum: Driving to... Pick up Bruce... So Juicy Sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet!

Super Cafe: The Next Knight Rises

We cut back to Bruce, and we get shown that the ears for his new suit are massive. Good God, are they massive.

Batman: Okay, the ears might be a little too much.

The end.