Super Cafe: Who's a Hero

Coming Soon

TBA

Transcript
(The video opens with the HISHE logo, then cut to the Super Café with Batman, Superman, and the Eleventh Doctor in it. The TARDIS is visible outside)

Superman: I really don't understand. If you couldn't stop the guy in a top hat before, how does Clara jumping in your time stream suddenly fix the problem?

Batman: Yeah, for real.

Eleventh Doctor: It just does! I don't know; she's the impossible girl! So do you two just sit here? Every day? How do you not get bored?

Batman: So what are you doing here, Mr. Doctor?

Doctor: Well, being a Time Lord, I've saved entire planets time and again. I'm basically a superhero for the universe. So I thought I'd take a little break, drop on by and say, "You're welcome, gentlemen."

Superman: You save planets?

Doctor: All the time. Yes.

Superman: Well, my planet exploded. So what's the deal?

Doctor: Ah yes! Krypton! Sorry about that. Fixed point in time. I couldn't interfere. Very difficult to explain.

Batman: Hmm. Convenient.

Doctor: Yes. Yes it is. Just like your utility belt, as they say.

Batman: Just like your magic wand.

Doctor: It's not magic! It's a sonic screwdriver, and I bet you'd love to have one!

Batman: No. I'd have a bat-screwdriver.

Doctor: What would a bat do with a screwdriver?

Batman: You could have saved Rory and Amy!

Doctor: What? They lived happily ever after!

Batman: You abandoned them in America.

Doctor: Is he always like this?

Batman: AMY! I would have gone back for you! Because I'm Batman!

Superman: Sorry. He's kind of passionate.

Batman: She's so hot.

Doctor: Attractive companions! Yes! One more item on the superhero comparison. As I said, you're welcome.

Superman: So what's next, doc?

Doctor: Oh, I don't know, more of the same, I suppose. Always running, always saving. Probably get a new body soon. Big adjustment period, really.

Superman: Well, let us know if you ever need any help with a Dalek or something.

Doctor: Oh, I don't think that would be necessary.

Superman: Why not?

Doctor: You see, it's hard to snap a Dalek neck when they don't have necks to begin with.

Batman: Oh snap!

Doctor: More like no snap! (laughs) You see what I did there?

Batman: You're all right, Mr. Doctor.

Superman: You guys are never gonna let that go, are you?

Batman: Now seriously, go back and save Amy.

(The Doctor looks shocked. Cue title and HISHE logo.)

(Cut to inside the TARDIS, where Batman has somehow snuck in and is flirting with Clara Oswald)

Batman: Hey. You wanna know my secret identity?

Doctor: No! No! Out! How did you even get in here?

Batman: BECAUSE I'M BATMAN!

THE END

Trivia

 * In this episode, the Eleventh Doctor notes that he will probably get a new body soon. However, according to the Doctor Who 2013 Christmas special The Time of the Doctor, the Doctor has already used up all of their twelve regenerations at the time, meaning that they technically cannot regenerate at this point.